Attack of the Flying Mutant Pears!
by Eliana Gwen
Summary: A very weird fic by Aurora the Enchantress and I! It's kind of...*ahem* misleading....*lol* But, no flames, cos we really didn't want it to be any good. HAH!!!!!


  
Attack of the Mutant Pears (and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles...)  
  
By: Aurora the Enchantress and Darkchild  
  
~*~  
Zelda looked out the window and thought about none other than Link. She sat there and her eyes glazed over. She was practically drooling over this boy who was a warrior, not a lover. She was so in love that she practically melted every time she heard his name. That's when everything in this love-sick-girl's story began...  
  
She'd loved Link ever since she'd first set eyes on him. Those screwed-up bangs and big blue eyes when he was a child had made her heart stop cold when she turned around to face him in her courtyard. Zelda had been only 10 then, but she knew true love when she saw it!!  
  
Lost in her dreams, Zelda didn't notice the horrors that were impending upon her. Unbeknownst to her, flying mutant pears were taking over the kingdom of Hyrule!  
  
"AGH!!!!!" She yelled as she scrambled to the door. "PEARS!!!!"   
  
Her father as sitting in the kitchen marveling at the magnificent chef's stewed prunes. "Zelda?" His pointed ears perked up.  
  
"DADDY!!!!!!!!!!! GIANT PEARS!!!!!!!!!!" Zelda screamed in horror as she burst through the thick kitchen doors. "HELP!!!"  
  
"What?" the King said (NOT Elvis). "PEARS? AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
They both grabbed something from the table in the kitchen and ran out the door, both screaming their heads off. Then, they heard a sound.  
  
"Dad-eee!!!" Zelda shrieked. "MUTANT NINJA TURTLES!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"Run! That one is armed with a anchovy pizza!!!" her father squealed.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Zelda yelled as she ran to the Forest. Link would surely help them. *Link* she thought...aw, never mind. Back to the action.  
  
Not caring that outsiders weren't allowed into Kokiri Forest, Zelda ran straight for Link's house (I wonder how she knows which one is his house... hehe *cough*), knocking over several of the Kokiri on her way. She yelled, "LINK!!!! MUTANT PEARS AND TURTLES ARE TAKING OVER HYRULE!!"  
  
Link walked out of his door, rubbing his eyes sleepily. He was wearing Zora band boxers. Zelda almost wanted to just forget the whole mutant pear thing and stare at him, but she knew that her father would probably not be very happy about that.   
  
"What?" Link asked, "Mutant pears? Zelda, what's your problem? I need my beauty sleep!"  
  
"No, they're REAL! I SAW THEM! THEY'RE FLYING AROUND THE CASTLE ARMED WITH ANCHOVY PIZZAS!!!"  
  
Link went inside and pulled his shirt on which said "I'm with stupid" and it pointed upwards (*giggles*). Link walked out side, still in his undergarments and yelled at Zelda "NO! I DON'T GIVE A *WATER*!!!"  
  
"Wha?" Zelda was very confused. Link was supposed to be her BOYFRIEND, not a lazy butt who wants to eat pork-rinds and watch the Dallas Cowboys lose another home game.  
  
"SORRY!!!!! Oh, should I pick you up at eight or nine or what?" Link said as he winked at her.  
  
"Oh, I don't care," Zelda said, all watery-eyed. "As long as YOU DO pick me up at all!"  
  
"ZELDA!!!!!!!!!!!!" her father yelled. "WHEN WERE YOU GOING OUT WITH A PEASENT BOY??? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY DAUGHTER, FEIND???"  
  
"NUTHIN!!"   
  
"Oh, yeah? SHOW ME!!!!"  
  
"You want a piece of me, huh?"  
  
"NO!!" Zelda yelled. *This is gonna be like an episode of Jerry Springer, here* she thought. "Oh, water, Link. Give it up. You can tell my dad."  
  
"What? No-"  
  
"Dad, I've been sneaking out to see Link all the time."  
  
"WHATTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ZELDA! I THOUGHT I KNEW YOU BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"Well, Link and I are secretly engaged and getting married tonight...oops....guess it's not a secret anymore, huh?"  
  
"YEAH, I GUESS NOT!!" thundered the King. "WELL, WELL...I FORBID YOU!"  
  
"Daddy, I'm a grown up woman now, you can't order me around anymore!"  
  
Zelda, Link and the King were too busy arguing to see the terrified Kokiri running around  
screaming. The Mutant Ninja Turtles and Flying Mutant Pears were closing in on them...  
  
Suddenly, the Turtles stopped throwing anchovy pizzas. They were getting hungry. They decided to eat the pizzas. So, they set out a red and white checkered picnic blanket and ate the rest of the pizzas. The mutant pears flying through the air sure looked appetizing. Without a second thought, the Mutant Ninja Turtles ate the pears too. Then the turtles' mommies called them to take their naps and, being good little turtles, they went home and went to bed after a long day.  
  
The King finally got tired and went home. And Zelda and Link... well, never mind.  
  
THE END  
  
~*~  
  
A/N: (from Aurora the Enchantress) Well, that was quite screwed up, wasn't it? *hehe* please review! This is the first Zelda fic I have ever actually posted! Tee hee.  
  
A/N: (from Darkchild) Yo, yo, yo!!! Sup? Sup? Well, well, well. Looks like I took part in ANOTHER weird fiction! Oh, well...it was so tempting! Yeah, we're a little hyper right now. We finally got some stupid little kid away after hours of having to deal with him, *lol*... Oh, well!! Love ya'll!!!! C'ya later, peeps!!!!  
  
Peace,  
  
Aurora and Darkchild ~*~  



End file.
